Chapter 18: The Silent Killer Of Personal Growth

How To Stop Playing The Comparison Game

Let me guess:

You were having a solid day…

Then you opened Instagram.

& boom.

Someone sold their startup.

Someone else just got married.

Someone else is on a yacht drinking champagne with a random billionaire.

Meanwhile, you’re just trying to finish your coffee and remember what day it is.

Sound familiar?

You’re not broken.

You’re just playing an un-winnable game.

The comparison game.

And playing this game?

It’s the fastest way to kill your momentum, your creativity, and your self-worth.

Why Comparison Sneaks In

The problem isn’t ambition. It’s proximity.

Social media was meant to connect us.

But, now it’s a never-ending scoreboard.

We used to compare ourselves to our peers in our small town.

Now it’s the 20-year-old in Bali making $100K/month hawking productivity templates on the internet.

But, here’s what no one tells you:

You’re comparing your Chapter 3 to someone’s highlight reel from Chapter 33.

And you wonder why you feel behind.

What Helped Me Step Out of It

I moved to Portugal with big goals:

Re-invent myself. Build new skills. Design a new business & life ASAP.

But halfway through month one, I found myself scrolling way too much.

Checking who’s doing what.

Who’s blowing up.

Who’s “ahead.”

And that familiar voice started creeping in:

• “You’re already behind.”

• “You’re not moving fast enough.”

• “You’re not even qualified to do this.”

So, I did the one thing I knew would work:

I logged out.

Grabbed my notebook.

And reminded myself of this truth:

You win when you’re playing your own game.

The only goal is to improve upon the version of yourself from yesterday.

Try This Today

Instead of spiraling about where you’re not, take a step back and ask:

“What do you actually want?”

Not what gets applause.

Not what looks cool online.

Not what someone else is doing.

You. What do you want?

Once you have that answer…

Now, get clear on what you can actually control.

Not the timing.

Not the outcome.

Not other people’s perceptions.

But what you can control.

Your effort. Your focus. Your next step.

TLDR — Answer these:

• What does success actually look like for me?

• What can I actually control on my way to my version of success?

• What’s the first small action I can take today that moves me closer to that?

The Only Timeline That Matters

Look, there will always be someone ahead of you.

More success. More money. More something.

So, stop playing the comparison game and focus on YOU.

Playing the comparison game puts you on someone else’s timeline.

Blocking out the noise and playing your own game puts you on your own.

Don’t trade momentum for anxiety.

Don’t trade depth for speed.

Get clear on your path, block out the noise, and put one foot in front of another.

Final Thought

If you’re in the comparison trap right now, take a breath.

Mute a few people or get off the internet entirely.

Reconnect with yourself, your values, and what “success” looks like for you.

You’re not behind.

You’re not too late.

You’re just early in your own story.

Comparison steals clarity.

Focus brings it back.

So run your own race.

Chart your own path.

And trust that it’s unfolding exactly how it’s supposed to.

Rooting for ya.

—Dodds